Sunday, October 30, 2005
11:17 PM
It I ran into an acquaintance while having dinner at Pasir Panjang Road on a lazy Saturday evening. She is someone I used to be hopelessly infatuated with in my teens. I'd rack my brains dry to think of how to make romantic gifts to give her, only to look back these days to see how cringe-worthily cheapskate and uninspiring they are.
Oh I still keep in contact with her, on MSN that is (and I still have her phone number I think, for decorative purposes). However, most of our conversations online usually end up with monosyllabic replies after a grand total of about 4-5 phrases (including the 'Hi's and 'Hey's). All of which culminated into a single wordless mutual wave of acknowledement when we met across the dinner table that evening.
Eventually, not a single word was exchanged, and I did not even have the courtesy to say goodbye to her (I shy marh). I just left unobtrusively.
I don't believe in coincidences; all things (ok, stuff like the above at least) happen for a reason, it's just that sometimes you see it, sometimes you don't, and sometimes you only understand many years down the road.
Yet, very often, we take 'coincidences' too seriously. Run into each other in the most unexpected places, or have siblings with same name, or have the same exact birthday, etc. And then we think that we are fated to be with that person.
I think this 'coincidence' is a sign and a message for me. For all the effort I've put in to maintain our 'acquaintanceship', the result was not even a word of 'Hi' or 'Hey' when we finally met 'coincidentally' in real life. For all the 'coincidences' I had with her, they were merely empty gimmicks to distract me from the fact that I barely knew her much more than what everyone else knew about her, and that the crucial 'layers of a sandwich' that made a relationship whole was all missing; a chicken toast without the cheese and the chicken.
I still believe that He's already planned for me the special girl of my life (and vice versa for her). And perhaps she will be the most unexpected and dissimilar girl I'll ever meet. Perhaps not, but regardless, all the requirements that matter will be present.
And then there's this chance that He means for me to be a bachelor all my life. I'm desperately praying.
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Haha! Dang! I always meet this person whenever Im out ... So many many * times... I hope it does NOT mean anythg
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# posted by 
: 8:08 PM
: 8:08 PM